Marry Yourself

Ladies, how many of us are still awaiting our Prince Charming and dreaming like little girls about that fairytale wedding that’s just gotta happen? How many of us are at our wits end because it doesn’t seem as though he’s out there? Well ladies, why not marry ourselves? I mean, yeah it sounds a little crazy and even desperate, maybe, but think about it. Who could possibly love us more than we love ourselves? You do love you, don’t you?

Here’s what you gotta do. Start planning your wedding. Don’t tell anybody yet, cause trust me, they’ll think you’ve lost your mind. Your wedding can be as big or as small as you like. Remember to budget cause you still got to go on your honeymoon. The first thing you should do is pick the date. If you’re not inviting anyone, this should be easy. But perhaps you will want a girlfriend or two to share your special moment with you, you decide, who knows, if they are single, they might just want to marry themselves as well. But it has to be girlfriends you trust because remember, hush is the word, you don’t want your sanity questioned.

Okay, after you’ve picked the date, it’s time to outline the events of the day. Since most weddings are performed in the spring and summer months, you should find plenty of interesting things to do on your special day. But if you decide on a winter or fall wedding, that’s fine too. Since this is a non-conventional event, who says you have to follow the norm. First and foremost a trip to the spa is essential. Nothing says I love me more, than a pampering session. But before you even do that, treat yourself to a nice breakfast to start the day off right. You can either prepare yourself a breakfast filled with all of your favorite edible delights or you can check into a hotel the day before and on the morning of your wedding order in room service. It’s your wedding day, do it how you do it!

Since you preplanned this day, I’m sure you’ve already made a hair appointment for the occasion. You know the queen’s locks have to be tight. So let’s see, we’ve got breakfast with ourselves, a trip to the spa and hair salon on our agenda, what else do we have to do? Oh yeah, before I forget, how about the reception? Now this is where you can invite other people to join in the celebration. You can have a traditional reception in party style or you can have a quaint little dinner someplace with your selected guest. Hum, let’s see, oh, mercy, I almost forgot the ring. Now that I think about it, you can either do a ring or perhaps a necklace or other piece of jewelry. Once again, you decide, it’s your day!

I must admit, as I’m typing this, I’m starting to question my own sanity at this point. Am I really sitting here telling women how to plan their own wedding to themselves? Let me continue, I think I’m on to something. Where was I? Aw, yes, remember when picking out your ring or whatever, please stay within your budget. You don’t want to purchase something that later will have you resenting yourself for spending too much money. It’s one of the number one causes of disdain in a marriage; you’re not trying to cause any conflict within your marriage.

What’s next? Your outfit for the occasion is the next order of business. Most brides get married in white dresses. The traditional white dress was worn to signify purity. I don’t know about you but my very thoughts would prohibit me from wearing a white dress, so color is definitely not an issue here. Decide what you’re going to wear on this once-in-a-life-time event. I can say that with certainty cause I don’t believe you’ll be divorcing yourself. If it’s within your budget, go on and splurge on your dress. Go on and buy you a real wedding dress. Okay, I’m strongly starting to question my sanity here. But really, this is serious business. I believe if you make this as real as the real deal, you’ll have a sense of closure on the whole, I want to get married thing. Trust me when I say, with the divorce rate extremely high and people doing a Jekyll and Hyde after they get that piece of paper, this way is much better.

Now for the hard part, which probably should have been done before any of the other things, but hey, this is my first time planning a wedding where a person would be marrying themselves, so cut me some slack, alright? Who’s going to officiate the wedding? There are all kinds of places that perform unconventional marriages, so this might not be too hard to find, now that I really think about it. And since some people are opting to just live together so that they won’t have to worry about paying that nice chunk of change to get unhitched, the wedding performers might be a little desperate themselves. So check around and see what you can find.

Last but certainly not least, as they say, what are you doing for the honeymoon? This one is limitless. You can either go on a solo cruise, a few of your pals and yourself cruise, or you can take about a week off from work and hole up in a swank hotel suite. Do whatever you like, this is all about you!

Well, I think I’ve covered everything. I’ve been married before and there wasn’t much planning or money that went into my trip into Helly Matrimony, and I am truly thankful for that. But, if I were to do it again, which by the way, I have more of a desire to marry myself, than I do a man, these plans look about right.

I sure hope this has been most helpful, if only for a good laugh. Once my money gets right, I might have to put this into action. My current beau and I have no plans of getting married, but hey, I don’t think he’ll mind if I marry myself.